So yummy! So yummy!

Welcome fellow par-tay ladies from the 5 Minutes for Mom Blog Party! If you haven’t heard of the par-tay, stick around, grab some dip, and join in the fun. Well, as much fun as you can have typing away on your compy ignoring screaming kids.

I’ve been blogging here since mid-2007, and I have a review blog with Dawn from Mom2My6Pack/Because I Said So called Mamas Like. I spend most of my time working on my web store, Good for the Kids, where I offer products for babies, kids, and mamas. It keeps me way too busy, but it’s something I’ve always wanted to do and I think I’m pretty good at it. Check it out. All of my blog readers get a discount using coupon code 10offblog. Bonus!

A little about the “Me” who is typing: I enjoy TV, food, and my compy (oh, MacBook Pro, how I love thee). I’ve been married for 10 years this September - 8 years too long. I have webbed toes just bad enough to where I can’t wear toe socks, I enjoy crappy TV, I enjoy good TV, and I hate cooking. I also hate cleaning, laundry, and general housework. I am on a mission to find a housewife who will work for free. My husband thought he married one, but he was sorely mistaken. To be a good housewife, I’d have to be my mother, and that just wouldn’t be good. HockeyMan says he’d trade me in for her any day just to get her cooking and clean socks, but he was under the influence at the time I’m sure.

Oh yeah - I have 2 kiddos born 18 months apart. To me, better worse than twins because the older one teaches the younger how to plot against me. Their names are The Boss & Trouble. Just check their birth certificates. They are THE CUTEST kids on earth. DON’T even think of telling me that your kids are cuter. Cause they ain’t. And my kids are way smarter than yours.

Now to the good stuff. I have a prize available on the main 5 Minutes for Mom Blog Party, but I’m offering a prize here as well! Two prizes! What could be better?

Leave a comment here by March 14 at 11:59pm telling me how pretty I look today or how heeelarious you think I am (for serious - not required, but SO nice to hear!), sign the Mr. Linky (not required for the giveaway), and you’ll be automatically entered to win a $50 gift certificate to my online store, Good for the Kids. That’s 50 big ones to spend on your kids yourself just for leaving a comment and getting your bloggy par-tay on!

Go shop now because just for shiz and giggles, if you happen to be the big wiener winner, I’ll refund the amount of the gift certificate PLUS domestic shipping costs back to you. BONUS BONUS! You can thank me later.
The winner will be notified here, via email (no need to leave your email address in the comment, just in the form), and on Prizey.Fetch.

Thanks for stopping by! Please come back. I need the validation and attention.

The contest is now over, but feel free to leave comments. I’ll always need comment lovin’. 

Now that you’re read that word, you must now do them. It’s impulse - like Pavlov’s dog.

I was just lying in bed with Trouble begging her in my head trying without success to get her to fall asleep. When The Boss was first born, I started counting to 100 in my head when I asked prayed begged willed wanted her to do something like fall asleep at 3:34am. I figured in my warped new mama mind, that when I finished silently counting to 100, she’d do as I wanted. It actually worked a few times, and that got my OCD brain to think it would work forever. That was almost 4 years ago, and I still count to 100 to will them to sleep.

So tonight, as I was counting to 100 along with the ticks of the clock, I thought it would be the perfect opportunity to do my Kegels.

tick - clench - tick - release - tick - clench - tick - release - tick - clench - tick - release - tick - clench - release - tick

Correlation: 2 kids out the vuh-ja-ja = need to do your Kegels on a regular basis

While I was in the middle of my Kegels (please don’t visualize), I thought, “Can I get sore from Kegels?” Or, is that the reason for doing Kegels. And who is Ms. (I hope a woman discovered these) Kegel? And if I get sore, what will THAT feel like? Will I need to put IcyHot on my vuh-ja-ja?

And if I do, will I like it?

Front: The Boss, still-crapping-in-her-pants 3-1/2 year-old, way too smart for my own good, creative, imaginative, says, “How, ’bout that!” way to knowingly

Back: Trouble, short-fused, big hair, big smile, compassionate, says, “Come on, everybodeee!” way to cutely

Canine: 11-year-old pound puppy, recently discovered heart murmur, 10 pounds overweight, friendly (see above)

I’m not feeling as (can’t even think of the word now as I write) sarcastic and writerly as usual. I think it’s the 200 orders I have yet to ship out from being gone 1/2 of February.

Please submit ideas you’d like me to write about in the comments below. Maybe that will help…

Oh, Mama Oprah. Please give me some inspiration. And, yes, Mama Oprah, I know Mr. Tolle has taught us not to label ourselves and others, but right now, I don’t wanna think. I’m reverting back to my pre-New Earth ways for a few days.

Yes, these pics are meant to make you, those crazy people who live north of Florida, VERY jealous.

You can make me jealous May - Sept when it’s friggin 107 1/2 degrees here in 100% humidity while Hurricane Bitch is cutting off my electricity (and my beloved internets) and Jim Cantore is telling us to hunker down for the 5601st time.

And suckas, these pics were taken YESTERDAY. Bwahahahaha…..

I was off today avoiding work and trying to drum up more than the 5 stalkers that I currently have, and I stumbled upon MY boyfriend’s face on ANOTHER girly’s blog. How DARE that Playgroupie! I have PROOF he is MINE.

Though it seems, I may not be the only lovah of Jim, I have the best celeb name for us - Jimgie or Angim.

Who is Your Ideal TV Boyfriend?

More on Gossip Girl. Created by BuddyTV

Cuties

1st Visit to the Dentist

Electricity

Lashes

Mishi / Secret Agent Mama said her garage was worse than mine. So, Miss Mishi, I formally challenge YOU to beat this:

And now for why we NEED the new garage shelves:

I’ll put up “after” shots when we’re done. Hopefully, that will be very soon.

I’m running a giveaway in my store, Good for the Kids.

You can win $50 in Melissa & Doug toys, puzzles, and games.

Yeah, I know. You’re welcome.

If you mention the giveaway on your blog or site, I’ll enter you 5 times. Just let me know you’ve posted the giveaway.

Let’s see if I can follow through with this one. I’m not THAT crazy and setting myself up for failure just yet, so I’ll do my best to stick with the MONTHLY blog-a-day thingy. What’s great is this month’s theme is LISTS! I LURVE me a list, so this should be easy-peasy. Hard part - thinking. I can’t do a lot of it lately, so I’ll try my best to be both witty and lovable at the same time with this list.

Favorite Sounding Words

onomatopoeia - I can even spell it. All that teachering did me some good.

fudge - As in “What the fudge?” or the delicious chocolate treat.

snot - Just stay it aloud. It’s funny.

poo - Not poop. Poo.

hootenanny - As in, “We’s gonna be down at that there hootenanny this weekends gettin our drunk on.”

milk - Say it like “maalllk” with milk phlegm in your throat. It’s funnier that way.

Dubai - Just cause I wanna go there. My sis may get to go in a few years to work on the new SeaWorld island. Me = crazy jealous.