Dear Clothiers, I need lube to fit into your skinny jeans. Also, an Old Navy coupon.

Tuesday, December 15th, 2009

I’ve told you about awesome Old Navy coupons before, and I’m back, back again… Shady’s back, tell a friend with another $50 off a $100 purchase.

Old Navy has a fancy new app on Facebook to match clothes to your FB friends & family based on their activity. It’s pretty fun, but unfortunately, it had me wearing skinny jeans. It apparently doesn’t take into account my wide load in the back.

Bygones.

From Old Navy: “The Fab-u-lister can find the perfect gift for everyone from Funny Ladies to Fashionistas, from the Guys’ guy to Super Dad! It gives fab gift suggestions for your Facebook friends by checking out their profiles and takes the hassle out of making those pesky shopping lists.  Plus, score a 15% off coupon by Fab-u-listing and printing out your list!”

Fab-u-lator for Old Navy

Go try it out on your Facebook account.

What’d you find in the Fab-u-lister when you tried it? Anything good? Anything funneh? Anything that wouldn’t fit over your fat arse even with an entire bottle of some serious oily lube? Bygones. Again.

The first 3 commenters to let me know what was picked for you on the Fab-u-lister will receive a $50 off $100 coupon good thru December 20th.

No disclosure needed. I gots nothing… I know. Berate me.

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I’m completely lucky to get the new HP Fancy Pants printer

Friday, November 13th, 2009

I’ll just say it. I lucked out. Completely.

I was/am lucky enough to be given the new HP Photosmart Premium TouchSmart Web All-in-One Printer. (Try saying that 3 times…) Being a writer for Aiming Low has its many privileges.

In receiving the printer, I was asked to write an honest, personal review of the printer as I use it in my home and with my business. That’s good, because it’s hard for me to NOT be honest. I’m a horrible actress. I’m also a horrible joke-teller, but that’s for another day.

That said, I LOVE THIS PRINTER. I’m considering introducing a bill to congress making electronics marriage legal, that would probably pass here in Florida. We’ve always been an HP printer household, so I knows my HPs. I know what to expect: that they’re good darn printers.

Seeing that I loves a list, here are my pros & cons lists for the Fancy Pants (a technical term) printer:

Pros:
• My 3 year old can use it to print Disney and Nickelodeon coloring sheets.
• The picture and graphics print quality is FAR beyond what I ever expected from a home printer.
• You don’t need a computer, just an internet connection. You don’t even need a WiFi connection – you can plug right into your modem or ethernet.
• It’s pretty. It’s shiny.
• It’s pretty much idiot-proof. (see: My 3yo can use it. Not that she’s an idiot, but really, if my 3yo can use it, any adult idiot can use it.)
Print cartridges are cheap (~$10 each) and last longer than other printers’ I’ve used.
• It prints double-sided. As a small business owner, that’s completely awesome.
• Dual paper trays, which means you don’t have to get up off your booty every time you want to print out a photograph of your adorable (but not as adorable as mine) kids.
• Because it’s connected to the web, there are updates to the printer that download themselves. (see: idiot-proof) HP has promised to add more apps to their already-large app library. And you know, apps are the new black.

Cons:
• My 3 year old can use it to print 100 Disney and Nickelodeon coloring sheets.
• As a small business owner who prints up to 100 pages at a time, I had problems with the printer feeding more than one paper at a time.
• It’s pricey, but they just dropped the price to $340. BUT, when you trade in your old printer (ANY old printer, in ANY condition), you can save $50. That makes it under $300 for those of you who are math-slow.

So tell me, if you were in the market for a printer (and aren’t you always in the market for something way-awesome?) would you buy this printer? Why or why not? What do you look for when you buy a new printer other than it being able to actually print?

The fancy folks at HP will be reading what YOU have to say here. (*waving HI!*) Tell them what you like/don’t like/wish-it-could-do in regards to this printer or any other printer. I bet they’ll write down, in a fancy-pants HP kind of way, what you have to say. They’re cool like that.

Gotta say it: My disclosure statement.

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Easiest way to make yourself look Awesome? Personalize everything.

Tuesday, October 20th, 2009

I’m not really what you’d call a high class woman, but I would describe myself as pretty effing Awesome. Being the Awesome person I am can be time-consuming and cost money, but because I’m pretty effing Awesome, I spend time looking for deals to make it LOOK like I spent money.

That’s where places like Tiny Prints come into my life. Pretty effing Awesome stuff for not a lot of monies.

Tiny Prints is one of those online stationery stores your friends send you to with a link saying, “Check out THIS cute baby photo announcement!” and “I totally want this for my Xmas card this year!” and “Mama must have this personalized gift tag or I will die 1000 deaths.” I know it’s not just me sending these messages to my friends because Tiny Prints has been on my radar for at least the last year as a must-shop for stationery and photo cards. When I was approached to do multiple reviews for Tiny Prints, well, HELLO? Am I going to turn away the opportunity to send out that “Oh Em Gee, this design is PERFECT for us this year” message to my bloggy friends? Heck no. Bring ‘em on.

The first two items I ordered are the personalized gift tag stickers for our Christmas gifts and matching personalized thank you cards. Being the silly, snarky mo’fo I am, I picked out the cheeziest design I could find and personalized them with my own punny snarkasm.

Having the personalized gift tags ready to go for any gifts we give out really applies to my “Aiming Low” philosophy of living: no need to think; just stick & give. I must say, I was surprised at the quality of the stickers considering they’re only $7 for an entire personalized set of 24. You can’t even find an embroidered Christmas sweater for $7, much less find anything personalized for $7. Bonus: you’ll look pretty effing Awesome to your gift recipient with a personalized gift tag. They’ll think you paid much more that you did for the scented candle you found on sale at the $1 store that’s inside the box you’re giving them. WIN/WIN

The first thing my husband said to me when I told him our thank you cards arrived: “Are you actually going to send them this year?” Pshaw. Of course I’ll be sending the personalized thank you cards this year. They say “Awesome” right on the card. How can I NOT send them out? Plus, they make me look pretty effing Awesome because they’re printed on such high-quality card stock. (Like, the nice stuff.) Just like the gift tag stickers, the personalized thank you cards are priced well to help you look like you’re the pretty effing Awesome person you are.

I urge you to send a gift to Messy Semi Clean House this year. You’ll get a pretty effing Awesome thank you card in return. Even if it is just to spite my husband for doubting me.

Also, we like presents, and we have no shame.

If you’re extra lucky, you’ll get a $1 store scented candle with a pretty effing Awesome gift tag sticker on the outside. You’re welcome.

______________________________

This post is sponsored by Tiny Prints. I received the products shown in return for this review.

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    If you're a troll or you steal my stuff, I'll kick your shins. Hard. And I'll release the Mommy Bloggers on you - them bitches is nasty.
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