There’s very little things I’m grateful for more in my life than Patrick giving of his vas deferens to the great medical waste dump in the sky.
(I’m not sure that’s the actual body part that was snipped at the in-and-out vasectomy appointment those 5+ years ago, but I don’t feel like looking at photos of nutsacks this morning, and “vas” is common to both the body part I’m naming and the procedure, so let’s just pretend I’m right.)
Exactly 3 weeks after I pushed my second and most precarious child from my tearing nethers, Patrick drove himself to the urologist, laid his pantsless self on the examining table, smelled the sweet smell of burning flesh, then drove himself home to lie on the couch for exactly 2 days with ice on his now-spermless junk. 6 days after the procedure, he played ice hockey. To say he’s the manliest of manly men is an understatement.
It’s the greatest gift he’s ever given me and my family: The Gift Of the Snip. Best $130 co-pay ever.
I do not want, I’ve never wanted, I’d give up for adoption, a 3rd child. I’m not kidding.
For me, it’s not for me. For those of you who do have 2+ children, I applaud your sanity. I bow to your ability to stay alive and keep the children from being taken away by the Department of Children & Families. You? Are Wonder Woman.
Me? I’m a 2 Kid Mother. No more, no less.
We had the pleasure of babysitting my 2-month-old niece Sunday night. She’s gorgeous. She’s sweet. She’s easy. She smells like a baby. She’s cuddly. She smiles. She’s an amazing baby model.
We had her all to ourselves for 6 hours.
Within the first hour of having her here, my decision to never have another baby was cemented, covered, smothered, chunked, diced, and gravied. Never ever NEVER do I want to have to be responsible for another baby. Ever.
They are hard work, yo!
All that cradling and rocking and swaddling and feeding and sleeping and not sleeping and crying and crying and snuggling and crying?
Hard work.
I’m happy to babysit and give them back.
But damn, she’s cute.
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
Cute indeed! On a random side note, in my city fathers are scheduled to have their vasectomy no less than 6 months after their last child is born. It’s “just in case” something were to happen (ie SIDS) to their baby.
Hard work? I did most of it….at least on Sunday! Haha.
The snip was way easier than going through a third pregnancy from the male perspective. Kudos to the men out there that choose to live with pregos more than 1 or 2 times. Haha, again I kid, especially if you read this and are prego yourself. You look gorgeous and your feet are just slightly swollen and yes, that’s perfectly normal.
The work for a baby is all fine compared to all the damn stuff you need for a baby. I do NOT miss the 3 page checklist just to go to the grocery store.
Also, thanks for the manly compliment.
An Awesome post on Hockeymandad´s blog … hockeymandad- @2princessmama @alotofnothing @tijuanaflats OW!
THANK YOU! I’m sending hubbie over here to read how appreciative you are. He can’t seem to find the time to get his junk snipped and ease my “2 Kid Mother” mind. Maybe he will get it if he reads how much it meant/means to you.
He is the Manliest Man of Mandom.
I didn’t want a 3rd either. I got one anyway 11 and 1/2 months after my 2nd was born. So to prevent a 4th, I found a doc who would tie my tubes within 24 hours of birth. If I wasn’t married already, I would marry him. The anesthesiologist too.
My hubby volunteered but he had no insurance, so I got the smiley belly button.
She is a cutie but I’m glad she’s not mine either.
An Awesome post on Sarah´s blog … Duct Tape and Gorillas
My husband and I have the same plan: exactly two, and any others brave enough to venture out are …. well, fools. We aren’t even ready for kids yet, what with living in two different states and whatnot, but this post made my uterus glow (Do/did you watch Scrubs? Think Elliot Reid.). Other people’s babies are so cute and *almost* make me want to run out and get pregnant.
awesome and that baby was adorable but he is like the cutest baby girl ever because my cousin is the cutest baby boy ever.
An Awesome post on Adam´s blog … Olive Garden Restaurant Specials and Promotions
My philosophy? Never have more children than you have hands…but there are times that the feel and smell of a newborn is so deliciously tempting.
I want that gift, too.
An Awesome post on Mwa (Lost in Translation)´s blog … Kill- baby- kill!
she is pretty darn cute. it’d be hard not to be tempted even just a tiny smidge.
An Awesome post on Alexandria´s blog … 12 things I could do before the world ends on Saturday
This post cracked me up! I’ve read it 3 times and laughed each time. And that’s one cute baby!
An Awesome post on Lori´s blog … What are YOU doing today
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