All it takes is a little ass kissing, begging, pleading, and promising, and you, too, can be a cool kid on Alltop!
I’d like to thank the little people – XBox4NappyRash for telling me NOT to email Alltop (which I ignored and emailed anyway, the bastard) and Sarcastic Mom for encouraging me to be as helarious as I could be (which will never measure up to the greatness that is Lotus) and SEND that email.
Most important, of course, I’d like to thanks the people at Alltop for taking me not-so-seriously and putting me up in the Humor section. I guess I have to make sure I’m hilarious as usual.
In case you’re wondering what it takes to be cool like me, follow these steps:
1. Admit to yourself that you are cool and you need to share your coolness on Alltop.
2. Search for hours to find out how to let Alltop know who you are. Or, just click on “About us” on their site.
3. Write a very uncool blog post about Alltop. Like mine.
4. Don’t listen to self-admitted idiot men like XBox4NappyRash and send Alltop a “for your consideration” email. Like I did.
5. Sit back and wait for your coolness to be validated by the self-admitted cool people who are Alltop.
6. Now ignore your screaming children begging for your attention as you watch the new traffic roll in. I’m ready… Bring it on.
Hello, new readers! I love you all as much as I love a new pair of underwear – soft and taught for the first few wearings, but then wear out after the stain gets too gross.
Welcome! Now leave a comment, bitches. The 6th grade picture of me thanks you.
{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }
I always knew you were cool. I think I had those exact same glasses.. need to find that picture now.
Kim’s last blog post..Helping or Hurting?
That’s a very err… ‘unique’ picture.
Were you electrocuted?
Xbox4NappyRash’s last blog post..Not bad for €10 an hour
Incidentally, I strongly refute the scurrilous claim that I’m a bastard.
I have had at least 3 or 4 fathers.
Xbox4NappyRash’s last blog post..Not bad for €10 an hour
The underwear would last longer if you’d just wash it once in a while!
Hockeyman’s last blog post..Weekend Fun
[re=2521]Hockeyman[/re]: I’m SO doing a ‘High 5′ right now….
Xbox4NappyRash’s last blog post..Not bad for €10 an hour
[re=2522]Xbox4NappyRash[/re]: Back atcha…
Hockeyman’s last blog post..Weekend Fun
[re=2515]Kim[/re]: You MUST show us all.
[re=2521]Hockeyman[/re]: You suck.
[re=2518]Xbox4NappyRash[/re]: You suck, too.
I am sooo envious. I wish I were that funny…then I might have a shot. I salute you, Alltop Mama (better, perhaps than No-top Mama? Which I suppose could be your new alias in case you get so famous that you can’t walk around without the equivalent of huge dark glasses on…)
MommyTime’s last blog post..Looking for Seals (Photo Hunt: Glass)
I was always taught make a provocative statement and they’ll seek you out! Way to go, Ang. FYI – hotness in that picture – HOTness!
dkaye’s last blog post..Don’t take me if I don’t want to go…
wonderful underwear description!
Light’s last blog post..Tidbits of Life!
wow… I’m impressed!
Tara R’s last blog post..Book Review
[re=2526]MommyTime[/re]: I’m all about the cool in my hot housepants.
[re=2527]dkaye[/re]: It’s all about the power of a sexy woman.
[re=2528]Light[/re]: And so accurate.
[re=2529]Tara R[/re]: As you should be.
“hot housepants,” not to be confused with “hothouse pants,” I presume? Which are what you would wear for gardening, if you had a greenhouse?
MommyTime’s last blog post..Looking for Seals (Photo Hunt: Glass)
I wish you still wore those glasses…It would make the Skank Outings THAT much cooler…
I had those exact glasses in 6th grade except mine were red. I was totally like Sally Jessie Raphael.
PS. I designed that alltop button and you’re the first person I’ve seen use it. You made me all giggly.
Jenny, Bloggess’s last blog post..UPDATED – I’m like Katie Couric but less blonde.
How cool! Congratu-alltop-ations! Lurvvvve the fifth grade pic. I believe I’ve successfully burned all of mine, although there is a contract out on anyone I happened to give them to way back then…
Elle’s last blog post..Please Take A Moment
Now we can say “we knew you when”:)
ourcrookedtree’s last blog post..Ramblings from the Road
It just goes to show that I’m always right.
That picture never gets old, man, never.
Sarcastic Mom’s last blog post..You would scream, too, if you had to live with me.
Dayum you are the coolness! I am leaving a comment as instructed. Now backing away from the blog. I want no trouble.
oh mah gott you are too funny. ok, now i am clogging up your comment widget. hee.
VDog’s last blog post..Two Weeks
I could just say congrats, but that wouldn’t be me. So… that hair is “ALL-TOP”
BusyDad’s last blog post..The Return of Iron Chef Fury: Kitchen Stadium Showdown