No, I Don’t Eat Plastic Containers, But It Would Make Sense.

by Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] on April 18, 2012

in And Then Some,Farts and Other Stuff,Observations

There’s a problem in this world that needs to be addressed.

The problem begins with “plastic cont” and ends with “ainer.”

I’m all for saving the world, one plastic tree at a time, but there’s only so far this lazy housewife is willing to go. I don’t use quite as many Ziploc bags as I used to; in fact, I hardly use any plastic baggies at all. Instead I try to use reusable containers as much as humanly possible.

But DAMMIT, these plastic container manufacturers are making it harder for me to stay semi-sane.

Do you see all of those plastic container lids I have on the bottom shelf of the cabinet? There’s approximately twenty-eleven lids in there, all of which came with matching storage bases. Do you see all of those containers on the top slider shelf? There’s not twenty-eleven of them up there. I’d guess I have 1/2 the amount of containers than plastic lids to match.

I know what you’re thinking. No, I’m not one of those weirdos featured on My Strange Addiction who eats plastic containers.

Way back in 1998, I had a Tupperware wedding shower. Yes, really.

I had 3-4 other wedding showers, too, but the one with my extended family was a Tupperware party because at the time, my aunt was a consultant and my mom was very practical. For all intents and purposes, though it sounds weird, it was the best idea for a wedding shower ever. I was stocked up on a cabinet full of lifetime guaranteed plasticware, ready to start wedded bliss as a near-child bride.

I do still have most of that circa-1998 Tupperware, along with some odd pieces my mom handed down to me. Sometime along the way since I got married, the whole Earth blew up and every lunch meat processor started selling their cold cuts in reusable plastic containers.

Those lunch meat containers along with the grocery store-available containers have infiltrated my Tupperware cabinet.

And fuck-all, none of the plastic lids match any of the plastic bases. Even the lids made by the same manufacturer as the bases don’t match up with their own kind.

This square Ziploc lid doesn’t match its own square Ziploc container. ITS OWN KIND. They don’t even like their OWN KIND.

Ziploc should match Ziploc; Rubbermaid should match Rubbermaid; Glad should match Glad; Hillshire Farms should match Hillshire Farms; no-name-given should match no-name-given.

But these stupid plastic containers are stupid and don’t match up. I’d totally take the blame if it was a dishwasher-melting situation, but it’s just not so. They’re completely different and don’t match, even though the tops and bottoms are made by the same company.

I swear it’s a conspiracy, man.

Or maybe it’s a conspiracy BY The Man to keep us women in a tailspin of frustration in the kitchen.

It’s time to start a plastic container revolution. Or develop a taste for hard plastic.

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{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Cindy April 18, 2012 at 2:56 pm

Yes, yes and yes. What’s the deal with this phenomenon?
Also, I’ll see your plastic containers/lids and raise you the damn socks. How can I have socks for 5 people that are missing their match? I have 2 large draws and 2 bags full of single socks. I have gone through them for hours, several times, to match them up and there isn’t a set among them. It makes me insane. Why don’t I throw them out? What a waste. I just send my kids (and my husband) out with socks that sort of match – maybe they’re both stripes or polka-dots, maybe they are both pink, albeit different shades of pink, maybe they’re both white sport socks but one has a grey toe/heel and the other is all white, but they are sort of the same length so it counts.
It’s like the lids. I can’t come to throw them out because the second I do, I find the dang container. It’s happened on several occasions to me.


2 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] April 19, 2012 at 12:11 am

I have a laundry basket of solo socks that lives in my living room. See also: I have a hard time parting with things.
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … I Am A Whole Lot Of Nothing!


3 JustinRHoffman April 18, 2012 at 3:03 pm

My roommate and I just went through this debacle last week. We were throwing plastic across the kitchen and yelling swear words. Neighbors would have thought it was a domestic dispute, but thankfully tupperware just makes that hollow, plastic noise instead of shattering.
An Awesome post on JustinRHoffman´s blog … The Other Side of the Gate


4 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] April 19, 2012 at 12:12 am

I’m sure when the Tupperware creators were thinking of how they’d be used, they totally thought “keeping domestic disputes quiet” would be a benefit.
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … I Am A Whole Lot Of Nothing!


5 JustinRHoffman April 19, 2012 at 12:39 am

Yeah Tupperware dropped the “No More Black Eyes” slogan in ’71. #TupperwareFacts
An Awesome post on JustinRHoffman´s blog … (Almost) Wordless … Eduardo the Fish


6 Stacey April 19, 2012 at 10:38 am

I just had this tantrum too-then happened to be in Ikea and found this lovely 17 container set for $3.99! So when I got home I tossed all the unmatched pieces and I can’t tell you how good it felt!


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