The only reason to have kids is to create clone humans to take your place when you kick off.

Any other reason to breed pales in comparison to nature’s need to reproduce your genes. Unconditional love, feelings of worthiness, premature ejaculation, and one-upping your sister all fall into a distant 2nd place for reasons to spawn.

Patrick and I are raising our girls for us to each have our own Mini Me, as you can see in this photo I took this past weekend at Star Tours.

We’re successfully raising goofball, Star Wars-loving, Disney World-going nerds who will do pretty much anything for a laugh to replace us when we die.

You’re welcome, universe.

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2012. | Permalink | 6 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: anna, claire, Disney World, hollywood studios, instagram, star tours, star wars, walker

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(...)
Read the rest of These Photos, No Words (0 words)

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2011. | Permalink | 19 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: children, cinderella castle, Disney World, electrical light parade, magic kingdom, main street, photos, Wordless

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This llama is the most famous llama in all of the World of Llamas. He lives at the Affection Section of Rafiki’s Planet Watch at Disney World inside of Animal Kingdom. If you’re lucky, he’ll let you pet him. On the day we made friends, he had a little something caught in his teeth. It happens to the best of us.

Naturally, he’s my new best friend, and I’m making him my muse.

Dusty the Llama was the model for Disney’s The Emperor’s New Groove. He was totally unaffected by my own celebrity, but I guess that’s tit-for-tat because his movie is one of the few Disney movies I’ve never seen.

I’m thinking the animators were high on opiates when they drew Kuzco because THIS llama… (...)
Read the rest of My New Best Friend Is A Llama (33 words)

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2011. | Permalink | 17 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: "animal kingdom", Disney World, llama, video

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I have a friend.

A very dear friend.

Mandi has a wonky heart. No, I take that back. Her heart is bullshit. Her bullshit heart has put her through 5 open-heart surgeries which I hear are very serious, the last one leaving her in a 3-week-long coma, a wheelchair, and intensive physical therapy.

That was 5 years ago, today.

5 years ago TODAY, Mandi was rolled out of a hospital after open-heart surgery left her in a coma for 3 weeks, a pacemaker in her chest, and an actual *tick* in her heart. I heard it today. Her heart actually *ticks.* Not only is that weird, IT’S FRIGGIN AMAZING SCIENCE.

Thanks be to the sweet sweet Baby Jeebus and Oprah that this amazing science exists to keep Mandi alive and brought her to my life.

A little background on Mandi:

She’s a Disney nutball, complete with 3 Disney-themed tattoo, one being a hidden Mickey. mmhmmm…

She birthed a baby 6-1/2 years ago that doctors said she’d never have.

She adopted a special needs baby 3 years ago.

She lives in podunk O-HI-O and drives 4-wheelers.

She started running a few months ago.

She lost a lot of weight in just the last few months.

She’s beautiful.

TODAY, Mandi ran her first ever 5K at Disney World at the Expedition Everest Challenge with Patrick. She trained, she worked hard, and today, she ran across the finish line of a 5K, complete with obstacles at her favorite place in the whole world.

I can’t be more proud of someone I love.

She is amazing. She is my inspiration.

I love her.

I want you to love her, too.

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2011. | Permalink | 20 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: amanda bone, Disney World, everest run, heart, mandi

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I’m super duper mega sugar-coated chocolate-dipped ooey gooey jittery EXCITED to announce MouseGenius.com to you!

Last week, I teased you and now I’m pleasing you.

Mouse Genius is a site with smart insider tips and information for a visit to Walt Disney World. Whether you’re a seasoned Disney guest or a brand newbie to Disney World, the Mouse Geniuses are telling secrets about how to make the most of your visit.

PLEASE to go visit my new site. PLEASE to share my new site.

I think it’s awesome. I want you to think it’s awesome.

If you have feedback for me about the site, GIVE IT TO ME.

If you have questions for me or our Mouse Geniuses about visiting Disney World, PLEASE ask here!

HUZZAH!

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2011. | Permalink | 5 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: Disney World, mouse genius

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You know how when you get involved in something new (like a lover or new flavor of potato chips) and you can’t do anything else besides think about and work on that something new? I think it’s called “obsession” but I don’t want that perfume association in my head, because the last thing I heard about perfume, it was Lady Gaga’s blood and semen scented eau de parfum. That’s just not a visual or smell I want in my brain.

Since I was last seen here, I told you that I was starting a “tips and tricks of Disney World” website. Dudes, I’ve done it.

A teaser. Cute, right?

And it’s FANTASTIC.

That’s not just my self-centered opinion, but the people I’ve shown and asked to be a part of it think it’s great, too. I’m also going to be paying them for their work, but I’m pretending they like it even without the promise of money.

It will be launching next week, but for now, I have a teaser.

By the way, I hate when people say, “I’m doing this amazing thing but I’m going to keep it a secret and build your anticipation because it will increase my traffic for when you come back checking over and over for the big announcement but really it won’t be that big and probably won’t affect you at all but it’s important to me and I like having the power of anticipation over you.”

Or something.

So yeah, that’s what’s going on with me. A new, fancy, different-from-the-rest, Disney World site. A place to find answers to questions you have about visting the Mouse House.

For now, if you have questions for me and the writers I’m plying with promises of money, please leave them here in the comments. Or, if you’re just super excited to see what I’m developing, you can comment your squeeeeeing. Or or, just tell me I’m doing something good with my time and I’ll make million$.

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2011. | Permalink | 6 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: disney, Disney World, mouse

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This is the kind of professional photo you can get FOR FREE. photo credit WDW

It’s gonna happen.

…because I need more money work.

The “Our Opinions on Disney World, Not Theirs” site is a GO!

I have a name, I started the blog, and now I just need endless hours of writing, designing, and fretting to get through to launch it.

I think it could do well in the world of the internets.

I need your help. I need your assvice and your questions to get it rolling.

Whether it’s the for the first time or if you’re coming back, what do YOU want to know about visiting Disney World? Do you want to know the best place to take photos? The best place to eat dinner? Where you can find free stuff (that photo of Belle and Claire is FREE from Disney!)? What should you NOT do? How much time do you need to do something? ASK ME!

The site won’t be a “plan your trip for you” planning guide, but rather a tips and tricks and insider’s advice to what you must do, must see, can’t miss at Disney World.

What do you want to know?

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2011. | Permalink | 20 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: disney, Disney World, tips, tricks, trip, visiting

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I’m constantly asked by friends, family, and countrymen, “How do you make money on the internet?”

Friends, family, and countrymen, there’s a secret to making money on the internet.

Unfortunately, I don’t know that secret, but I do know a little about how to make SOME money working on the internets. There’s a recipe to getting the checks rolling in, and as soon as I know that one secret, you’ll be the first to know.

What I do know, can fit into my pocket along with my pocket pal, Kristen Chenoweth, and if you stick your hand in there to get my knowledge of money-making ideas, she’ll cut your pinky with her razor-sharp teeth. I’ve seen it happen. Don’t think I’m kidding.

But in all honesty, there’s a few things you need to do to make that elusive buck off of the backs of so many (see: Al Gore, my rich Nigerian uncle, Arianna Huffington, etc.) who laid the groundwork for modern day internetting.

It’s about content; publish something people want to read, see, and share. If I knew exactly how to do that, I’d be rolling around in Dooce’s money pit.

It’s about marketing yourself. Tell the world of the internet that you’ve done something. Don’t shove it down people’s throats by begging, pleading, and abusing the people who live inside your lappytop. Share what you’ve done. Be proud of your work. No one will know it’s there if you don’t tell them where to find it. Even the great and powerful Pioneer Woman shares her work on The Twitter and advertises her own book on her website.

I’m honored and proud to be a part of a blog that’s being recognized for its awesome. Curvy Girl Guide has been nominated for TWO 2011 Bloggies for Best New Weblog and Best Group or Community Weblog. That’s crazy outstanding for a new blog. I’m crazy happy to be a part of the site.

(see what i did there. good content + pimping = getting attention = making money)

My super duper BFF, Aunt Becky, is nominated for THREE Bloggies. HOLY CRAP. She’s up for Best Writing of a Weblog, Best Humor Weblog, and her group blog, Band Back Together, is nominated for Best Kept Secret.

(see what i did there? beckster has good content + me pimping her = making money)

This here blog is uncategorizable, so it doesn’t get recognized for anything. I’m not upset about it, and I never have been. I can’t take attention that I don’t make myself. Plus, it doesn’t compare to the likes of Aunt Becky and Curvy Girl Guide.

BUT… I’m thinking of starting a NEW FANCY money maker blog! Yesterday’s blog about tips and tricks for visiting Disney World got some great feedback and questions, so I’m thinking I need a whole blog just for those helpful hints.

What do you think? Could I get away with being uber honest and telling the people of the internet (YOU) our secrets to making the most of your trip to Disney World?

(it would be super good content + good marketing = mama needs money)

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2011. | Permalink | 5 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: blog, Disney World, internet, money

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I’ll admit that my family and I are super de-duper lucky to live in Orlando where, armed with our seasonal passes, we can go to Disney World when the weather is nice, the parks are semi-empty, and when we damn well feel like it. We have Florida Resident Seasonal Passes that have block-out days that pretty much tell us when we DON’T want to go to the parks, like when it’s either too hot or too crowded. These are times like Christmas, Spring Break, and nearly the whole summer. It’s a little “DON’T GO NOW, YOU DOPEHEAD.IT’S MEGA CROWDED!” message from Disney.

We also use the site TouringPlans.com that publishes a daily crowd estimate based on a whole bunch of algorithms, research, and park guest feedback into a pretty spreadsheet that helps us know which park is the least crowded for the day we’re going to Disney. (P.S. If you’re going to DW any time soon, it’s my humble assvice to pay the subscription fee to get the crowd estimation levels for when you’re going. TRUST ME.)

I’d say we’re pretty much seasoned professionals when it comes to visiting Disney World theme parks. My kid puked at the Magic Kingdom, I found the woman with the best name ever at Epcot, and I’ve seen and taken a picture of a very happy elephant ready for action.

So when we over-hear conversations and see families in the throws of frustration wandering aimlessly through the park, we kind of chuckle and thank the sweet, sweet Baby Jeebus that we live here and don’t have to travel with the stress of “ZOMG WE MUST ZOMG SEE EVERYZOMGTHING.”

We’ve observed pretty much every situation a visitors bring to Disney. From the Just Married couple wearing matching bride & groom Mickey hats to the couple who’s next stop after Orlando is to a divorce attorney. Disney World is the best place in the world for people-watching. And yes, I am watching you.

My personal favorite: the mom who has everything planned out to the tiniest detail (that’d be me if I was from out-of-town) on her last day of travel with 3 kids behind her, each in disheveled prince and princess costumes, and behind them is the dad dragging his feet with his eyes permanently rolled to the back of his head. She’s keeping her head held high, but at the slightest misstep from a kid or husband, she’s touched off into a rage to which the kids have never been privy. And that’s when the dad lets loose and leaves the family. LEAVE THEM ALL BEHIND. I’ve seen it happen.

As a person who worked at Disney World back in the 90s and has continued to visit the parks frequently over the last 10 years, I have some tips and tricks for those of you who are coming to visit (ME and) Disney World. And even if you’re not planning to visit (ME and) Disney World any time soon, you’ll love the stories of the disheveled who visit.

Number 1 (in no particular order) Tip for visiting Disney World: PLAN AHEAD.

You must. Even if you’re not a type-a person, make a list, do your research, and MAKE A PLAN. If you’re coming for just a few days, you won’t see it all. It’s impossible.  I can help you with a plan, but don’t expect me to make a magical do-it-all-in-3-days list of what to do. It’s not going to happen.

Number 2 (in no particular order) Tip for visiting Disney World: FIND A PACKAGE DEAL.

If you’re visiting from out of town or out of the state, do some research and find a package deal that works for you. If you’re looking to save some money (and if you’re not, this is not the blog for you), buying your meals, tickets, and hotel ahead of time is the easiest and cheapest way to make your way through your visit.

Number 3 (in no particular order) Tip for visiting Disney World: VISIT WHEN THE KIDS ARE IN SCHOOL.

*audible GASP* I know. I KNOW. I value my kids’ education just as much as you do. But seriously, if you want to have the best time possible and get the most done with the least amount of frustration, come to Disney World when school is in session. You won’t have to take the kids out of class for a whole week if you don’t want to, but a few days of school missed to go to the Happiest Place on Earth won’t push them back a grade level or keep them out of Harvard. You’ll thank me for the short lines and discounted package deals.

I’ll be writing more tips and tricks in other posts, but for now, I leave you with this, my most important tip:

DON’T COME TO ORLANDO IN JULY AND AUGUST. It’s balls-hot, and you’ll melt. Even we Floridians don’t go outside in the summer. It’s just unnatural to be outside in 98º heat and 90% humidity. Your unsweaty boobs and buttcrack will thank me.

Trust me people because THIS is an “empty park day” day.

Main Street to Cinderella's Castle at Magic Kingdom, Disney World

What else do YOU want to know about visiting Disney World? I’ll answer your questions in my next post unless you ask me to get you in for free. Those days for me are over.

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2011. | Permalink | 12 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: disney, Disney World, helpful hints, tips, tricks, visiting

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This was December ’09.

I can’t believe how much they’ve changed.

MAKE IT STOP.

© Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] for A Whole Lot of Nothing • Your Favorite Blog, 2010. | Permalink | 5 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: christmas, Disney World, girls

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