See? I don’t lie:

I can only hope that I’ll look this hot in these sexy panties (5 for $29 panties from Lane Bryant).

She totally has that “come hither and take this lace trim cami off of me” look.

Really, what’s sexier than a good sale. Not much, I’ll tell ya. Not. Much.

Except this guy:

Disclosure: I was provided a Lane Bryant gift card in exchange for the information I shared in this post. Still tho, it’s all my own opinion. I don’t lie. Nor am I shady. I’m also awesome. Obviously.

I’m not really what you’d call a high class woman, but I would describe myself as pretty effing Awesome. Being the Awesome person I am can be time-consuming and cost money, but because I’m pretty effing Awesome, I spend time looking for deals to make it LOOK like I spent money.

That’s where places like Tiny Prints come into my life. Pretty effing Awesome stuff for not a lot of monies.

Tiny Prints is one of those online stationery stores your friends send you to with a link saying, “Check out THIS cute baby photo announcement!” and “I totally want this for my Xmas card this year!” and “Mama must have this personalized gift tag or I will die 1000 deaths.” I know it’s not just me sending these messages to my friends because Tiny Prints has been on my radar for at least the last year as a must-shop for stationery and photo cards. When I was approached to do multiple reviews for Tiny Prints, well, HELLO? Am I going to turn away the opportunity to send out that “Oh Em Gee, this design is PERFECT for us this year” message to my bloggy friends? Heck no. Bring ‘em on.

The first two items I ordered are the personalized gift tag stickers for our Christmas gifts and matching personalized thank you cards. Being the silly, snarky mo’fo I am, I picked out the cheeziest design I could find and personalized them with my own punny snarkasm.

Having the personalized gift tags ready to go for any gifts we give out really applies to my “Aiming Low” philosophy of living: no need to think; just stick & give. I must say, I was surprised at the quality of the stickers considering they’re only $7 for an entire personalized set of 24. You can’t even find an embroidered Christmas sweater for $7, much less find anything personalized for $7. Bonus: you’ll look pretty effing Awesome to your gift recipient with a personalized gift tag. They’ll think you paid much more that you did for the scented candle you found on sale at the $1 store that’s inside the box you’re giving them. WIN/WIN

The first thing my husband said to me when I told him our thank you cards arrived: “Are you actually going to send them this year?” Pshaw. Of course I’ll be sending the personalized thank you cards this year. They say “Awesome” right on the card. How can I NOT send them out? Plus, they make me look pretty effing Awesome because they’re printed on such high-quality card stock. (Like, the nice stuff.) Just like the gift tag stickers, the personalized thank you cards are priced well to help you look like you’re the pretty effing Awesome person you are.

I urge you to send a gift to Messy Semi Clean House this year. You’ll get a pretty effing Awesome thank you card in return. Even if it is just to spite my husband for doubting me.

Also, we like presents, and we have no shame.

If you’re extra lucky, you’ll get a $1 store scented candle with a pretty effing Awesome gift tag sticker on the outside. You’re welcome.

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This post is sponsored by Tiny Prints. I received the products shown in return for this review.

“Why, no, I am not wearing a girdle. And no, I did not lose 15* pounds. I’m wearing my Yummie Tummie Shapewear Strappy Tank.”

So maybe that conversation didn’t really happen, but I can tell you I definitely feel at least 15 pounds lighter with my tummy flab sucked in with the help of the double-lining microfiber.

While at the Type A Mom Conference in September, I was lucky enough to be given the opportunity to give away Yummie Tummie shapewear tanks to some lucky ladies wearing their Yummie Tummie buttons. Truth be told, it was awesome to make the day of these women who were looking for me without even knowing I was the one with the goods. I likened myself to a Ninja Fairy spreading tummy-flattening cheer, only without the cool Ninja mask and Fairy wings. But I do leave sparkly dust in my path, so there’s that.

I present to you, my beautiful winners (one I pick out in the bathroom – you never know what goes on in there):

@treerootandtwig

@punditmom

@frelle

@savorthethyme

CONGRATS!

*Yummie Tummie shapewear claims to make 5 pounds disappear off of your middle, but with my tummy, 5 pounds on a smaller girl is the equivalent to 15 pounds on a big girl.

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GIVEAWAY – $100 Gift Certificate to Yummie Tummie

Join me and the ladies above sporting our Yummie Tummies!

Leave a comment here (1 per day for the duration of the giveaway) with your favorite Yummie Tummie Body Shaper. (You no leave-a a favorite shaper, you no win-a a gift certificate.)

Also, Tweet or link back to this giveaway (use this post URL for the pingback) for additional entries (also 1 tweet and/or link back per day). Leave a comment with your Tweet URL in the comments.

Comments will be open from now until Sunday, October 11th, at 11:59EST. One random winner will be drawn and will be announced here on this post.

Winners are limited to US & Canadian residents only. Sorry my Australian and Every Other Green Shape on the Map residents.

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Disclosure: I was given a Yummie Tummie shapewear tank in addition to payment for being an Awesome YT Ambassador.

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WINNER: Janna
Check your email for your gift certificate from Yummie Tummie.
Congrats!