The Easiest Crock Pot Asian Pork Wraps EVER

by Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] on May 1, 2012

in I like to eat,Mama Likes

I don’t even know who I am anymore.

I cooked yet another dinner.

I know.

Maybe my whole life before now was a lie. Maybe I just thought I was a non-working-in-the-kitchen housewife.

Is this real life?

A few weeks ago, I was at my sister’s house where she and my mom cooked up what I thought was an intricate, difficult, 26-1/2 ingredient linner (lunch/dinner) of Asian Pork Wraps.

We all, including the whiney children, fell over ourselves nomming up all of the wraps, leaving me to feel like the inadequate housewife I know myself to be.

Except, what they cooked up wasn’t intricate and difficult, nor did it have 26-1/2 ingredients. It was all a ruse. A delicious, delicious ruse.

The Asian Pork Wraps were actually made in the crock pot and had exactly 4-1/2-ish ingredients:

The Easiest Crock Pot Asian Pork Wraps EVER

PORK
4 lb. pork butt
1 jar of Kikkoman’s garlic and green onion teriyaki sauce (dump about 2/3 of the jar into the pot)
1/2 small onion, chopped (or some sprinkles of onion powder)
sprinkles of garlic powder
1 cup of water

Set it (for 7-8 hours on low), and forget it!
Remove hunk o’meat from pot, pull apart with 2 forks, add in remainder of teriyaki sauce to taste.

ASIAN SLAW
Whatever your grocery store has in a bag for Asian Slaw.

Mix.

WRAPS
Romaine or Bibb lettuce.

Pile on sauced pork and mixed Asian Slaw.
Nom through the moans of ecstasy, having heaven in your mouth.

Patrick basically humped himself eating most of it up last night. He likes to add some heat with Sriracha Hot Chili Sauce, but not me because I’m a weenie and like things with about as much bite as a toothless baby nibble.

And that Sriracha sauce? I’m pretty sure Patrick will be bring it into our marriage bed the way he’s fallen in love with the stuff. I just hope he doesn’t think he’s putting it on me in any delicate areas. Heat rash just doesn’t belong in some places.

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{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Hockeymandad May 1, 2012 at 1:38 pm

I’m not the only one with some love for the sriracha! No, it will remain out of the bedroom, it doesn’t belong on skin. Silly.

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/sriracha

Reply

2 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] May 1, 2012 at 10:50 pm

It doesn’t belong in my mouth either. Jus sayin’.
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … Women Are Not Juniors, Nor Are We Unisex. GAH.

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3 Angie's Favourite Sister May 1, 2012 at 4:06 pm

You. Are welcome.

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4 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] May 1, 2012 at 10:49 pm

I owe my life to you.
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … Women Are Not Juniors, Nor Are We Unisex. GAH.

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5 Momo Fali May 1, 2012 at 10:29 pm

You should probably just go ahead and come to BlogHer Food.

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6 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] May 1, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Can you imagine the stares of disbelief if that ever happened?

And those would be coming straight from everyone in my family.

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7 Lauren May 1, 2012 at 10:34 pm

Goddammit, you’re hilarious. P.S. Sriracha, albeit a sexy condiment, will stain sheets. Don’t ask me how I know.
An Awesome post on Lauren´s blog … April, Y U GO SO FAST?

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8 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] May 1, 2012 at 10:48 pm

That’s good to know.

You know what other foods stain sheets? I have no idea because I’ve never had food in my bed, YOU MINX.
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … Women Are Not Juniors, Nor Are We Unisex. GAH.

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9 Val Payne May 1, 2012 at 11:10 pm

If you start cooking fancy seeming dinners all the time, my people will expect me to do it too. So stop or start delivering to Snoqualmie , Wa.

PS. Feel free to add some of your Mama’s pecan pie to my take out order.

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10 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] May 1, 2012 at 11:16 pm

YEAH, RIGHT. Like I’d make extra and take the time to ship it across the country. I still have my niece’s birthday present sitting on the counter and her birthday was over 2 months ago.
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … Women Are Not Juniors, Nor Are We Unisex. GAH.

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11 Val Payne May 2, 2012 at 9:21 pm

S’ok. That was just a weak attempt at your mom’s pecan pie anyway…

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12 Corey Feldman May 2, 2012 at 9:38 am

We just got a crock pot a few months ago. I seriously love it. Have no idea why we waited so long to buy one!
An Awesome post on Corey Feldman´s blog … TMI Q&A – my battle with Anxiety, depression and ADHD

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13 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] May 2, 2012 at 10:11 am

This woman is my idol: http://crockpot365.blogspot.com/
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … Women Are Not Juniors, Nor Are We Unisex. GAH.

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14 Melinda@LookWhatMomFoundandDadtoo! May 2, 2012 at 1:53 pm

that sounds really really good, adding it to next weeks menu plan
An Awesome post on Melinda@LookWhatMomFoundandDadtoo!´s blog … Because Your Mommy Loves You

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15 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] May 3, 2012 at 1:41 pm

It’s totally good.
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … Kindle Of Ill Repute: More Romance Smut Book Recommendations

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16 Robyn May 2, 2012 at 8:38 pm

*SIGH* I think I’m in love. Oh, not with you…withthe crock pot lady. (http://crockpot365.blogspot.com/)

I mean, you’re really cool, and I really LIKE you, but c’mon. She’s got awesome recipes out the ying yang. For the CROCK POT!

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17 Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing] May 3, 2012 at 1:40 pm

I think I like her more than I like me, too.
An Awesome post on Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s blog … Kindle Of Ill Repute: More Romance Smut Book Recommendations

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18 Al_Pal May 3, 2012 at 9:49 pm

Bookmarked! Looks totally do-able, and nom-able.

My husband likes quite a bit of Sriracha, himself. I like to just dip my fork tine[s] in, then have a whole bite of food with it. Flavor without OMG hot.

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