This is when you bring me a margarita on the rocks with sugar instead of salt. NOW.

I’m just gonna whine and complain, mkay?

you better truckin say OK or i’ll line your floors with Legos and make you walk around blindfolded. that shit hurts, so let me complain, ALRIGHT?1!

#1 whine: my credit card number was stolen.
I work online and process hundreds of credit cards online every month, so I realize there’s always a risk in buying things online, but now that it’s happened to me, I feel violated. And not the good kind. The worst part is not the fraudulent charges; it’s the fact that I won’t get a new debit card from PayPal for 2-4 weeks. DUDES. 2-4 weeks like like a millennium in card purchasing land. I feel naked. Like someone has all of my left shoes and won’t give them back. fuckers. I spent this morning calling around trying to mess up the mess up and ask for monies from my mommy. And because she’s awesome, she gave me her credit card numbers to make my business purchases. (For the right prices, I’ll email you the number.)

#2 whine: #bumknee/#fracturedleg still hurts.
I’m supposed to be “acting lazy” for at least another week, but with a business (see above) and two little girls and a Messy House that’s extra messy, it’s hard to sit and do nothing. It’s also hotter than the Devil’s weenis outside, so wearing my knee brace sucks wet beaver nuts. I used a wheelchair this weekend at the Florida Aquarium, and lemme tell ya, those bastards are hard to use. Unless there’s a ramp to go down and then wheeeeeeee!

#3 whine: TweetDeck is Fail Whaling.
Yeah yeah, I’m using Whirl, but I likes my columns. meh.

#4 whine: I need clothes.
Yesterday, I asked the dear internets for help, and you guys did all you could. I bought 2 shirts (from my girlfriend, Grace’s, suggestion) and that —-> cherry dress in which I will look either adorable or 12 years old. Now I need to buy the shoes I found to complete my outfit. This dress will work for one night at BlogHer, but I need 2 more outfits/dresses: one COCKtail fancy and one cute/dressy. GET ON IT, INTERNETS.

Please? Help?

#5 whine: Summer TV repeats.
The cable channels have their new shows on, but the networks blow chunks. EXCEPT BIG BROTHER STARTS TOMORROW. ZoMgS I am esscited for that trash to start. LOVES it. Plus, it’s on like 3-4 days a week, which, for an addict like me, is more magical than a sack full of dolphin vomit.

Speaking of my TV addiction, read all about it in my Aiming Low post today. It’s all about addiction, but not the cat-hoarding kind, which I totally understand and fear might happen to me in 30 years.